Reiki and Relationships


Reiki Healing is, most practitioners will agree, suitable for emotional as well as physical conditions . . . and very much suited to self-healing for personal self-development. But how does that help us with the things that really matter to us in the real world? Like the more significant relationships in our lives . . . or lack of them. Reiki Master/Teacher Keith Beasley shares his story:


The main reason I took my second level Reiki course was because I thought it would help me with my relationships. Now, a few (!) years on, it seems appropriate to write about how Reiki can help us with our love life:


Accepting Responsibility

Before I took up Reiki I'd never really had a long term or particularly happy romantic relationship. I'd had girl-friends and a few, brief, 'good times' but things had always been strained and never wholly satisfying. None had ever got past spending the occasional weekend together. I was seriously thinking that the epitaph on my tombstone would read 'Just Good Friends'.


By the time I did my First Degree Reiki training I'd realised that the problem was me. To get a 'proper' girlfriend I probably needed to sort myself out a bit. I'd even sometimes describe myself as having an addiction - to a pretty face. Thus, the invitation to take second degree Reiki really caught my eye: it said that Reiki II was good for tackling addictions. OK I thought, lets do it!


Whilst Reiki I (the starting level - or first degree) enables us to give ourselves a healing treatment, it is at Reiki II (second degree) that we find out how to use Reiki for emotional and mental difficulties. If we feel ourselves worked up by something or confused, Reiki can be used to help us see 'the bigger picture', to face the reality of a situation and to move on from old, stuck, ways.



What Reiki's helped me to see

Having accepted that our failure in romance is up to us and that we need to change, there is much that Reiki can do to help us undo that within us that's been getting in the way of 'true love'. This list is by no means exhaustive, but gives some clues as to how changing our ways of thinking can improve our chances in the coupling game. Each of these is, to me (at least now!), a 'higher truth' about romance, relationships and love:


- Romantic Love is but one facet of Divine Love. I'd often spoilt relationships by expecting too much from a partner, by clinging. Reiki's helped me to see that it's unrealistic to expect our boy/girl-friend to satisfy all our emotional needs. We can also share love with nature, friends, family, community . ..  and love ourselves! By learning to love LIFE, so we put romantic love into perspective.


- A soul mate isn't necessarily our partner for life! We may well be REALLY drawn to a particular person and need to be with them . . . but that doesn't mean we have to set up home with them or to marry. Each time we 'fall in love' with someone it's for a reason . . . or perhaps a season . . . or, just maybe, for life! Thus, once we've learn what we need to in a given meeting/relationship (whether it lasts a few hours or a few weeks or some years) it's probably time to move on  . . . and allow a NEW soul-mate to enter our lives.


- Our love life IS part of our spiritual journey. Once we accept, which Reiki helps us to do, that we are more than flesh, blood and mind, then we see life as a soul journey. Just as taking up Reiki or pursuing Buddhism or yoga (etc) encourages and enables our personal development, so too do our relationships! Learning to BE with another person is a major stepping stone towards BEing part of the One-ness of Life, The Universe and Everything.


- We often need to learn to BE ourselves before we can BE in a relationship. How can we 'find ourselves' if we're surrounded by the ideas, energy and demands of other people? I doubt we can! It is no co-incidence, as humans are becoming more spiritually aware, that SO many people choose to live alone . . . it's a necessary part of finding out who and what we really are. Only once we've found that can we be comfortable and true to ourselves when in an intimate relationship.


Other benefits

To be able to give a Reiki treatment to the significant other in your life is great! Not only does it give us something positive to offer, but during Reiki we become 'closer' to the person we're treating . . . more aware of each others feelings and needs. It's an excellent way of helping to understand each other.


Reiki as a self-healing method is something we can do on, to and for ourselves pretty much wherever we happen to be and at any time. It's thus ideal as a general relaxation technique - for example to keep us calm whilst waiting for a date!


If Reiki can do all this for our love life, imagine what it can do for the other aspects of our lives!


In Conclusion

So no quick fix solution I'm afraid, but Reiki as a self-healing technique practiced over many years really can help us to face and deal with those aspects of ourselves that so often screw up relationships. I'm certainly extremely grateful that Reiki found me . . . and find it a real pleasure to help others take up Reiki and use it in their lives. After all, Reiki IS love!



For those looking for more direct assistance in relationship matters (or other areas of life) Keith often includes Reiki in this 'Where next consultations' - available to individuals or to couples.


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for more on what Reiki is and how you can learn it.